Blog0819

Let’s talk quick about relationships. Sound good?

Are you a “right fighter” in your relationships? OR…maybe not in ALL your relationships, just a certain few, or perhaps a certain one?

CONFESSION »» I used to be. (still am at times, I’m a work in progress)

I’m typically not one to back down, especially when I “think” I’m right. I like to prove my point, get others to see my perspective and acknowledge that they have! In some strange way, that felt like “winning” — BUT, at a very high price.

What I’ve learned is, being a “right fighter” doesn’t build bridges in relationships, it builds walls.

When we look to be the one to say, “I told you so, I knew I was right!” OR our mindset is fixed on “It’s my way or the highway” we lose opportunities to accept and love others.

Now, I do understand there are fundamental truths that are RIGHT and worth fighting for. Globally, in our communities, and behind closed doors. Yes. there. are.

But, in our everyday relationships and interactions, when conflict arises — is it more important to be RIGHT? OR, to find resolution and a common ground?

My desire to be a “right fighter” started to slip away in 2009 after I read this prayer by St. Francis of Assisi:

“Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.”

WOW! What a way to live, don’t you think? Seeking to console, understand, love? With this approach I don’t see fighting, I see peace.

I see “win-win”! «« THIS is what I’m striving for!

What do you think? Hit reply and let me know »» What’s the biggest challenge or problem you’re facing personally, professionally, or in your faith?