Daily KIP: Timing. Do you ever feel that God is on a coffee break or something because He isn’t seeing the urgency in “your” situation? Don’t forget that we see only a fraction of any situation. Most often “our” timing reflects impatience and/or selfish motive.
This topic has come up a lot lately in my conversations with friends and interactions with others. I’ve been hit over the head with it in a VERY real way and am sad to say that over the past 4 years – YES, you heard it 4 YEARS I’ve been really bad at giving others around me undivided attention.
I am not one to blame things on others or things or situations – I can only look in the mirror and ask the question, what role am I playing in this “situation” or what did I do to “set this in motion”?
I realized that I got a Blackberry!! aka. Crackberry, right? I can pinpoint the time when my “undivided attention” started to become divided. This wonderful piece of technology was FUN, it kept me connected, in the loop – I didn’t need to be tied to my computer to check an email, it came oh so conveniently into the palm of my hand. I literally fell in LOVE with IT!! THEN I learned how to text – oh boy! As I discovered all the wonderful features of my new BFF I discovered PINing and Instant Messaging too – I was hooked, addicted BUT, OH SOOOOO disrespectful to everyone who was “present” in my world.
I’ve been confronted by people who have shared with me the reality of who I was becoming……..It was difficult to hear at the time because my intent was never to cause anyone any pain or disrespect. Why was I doing what I was doing? Was the noise that my phone was making to alert me that there was a NEW message THAT important that I needed to constantly be checking it? Seriously, who did I think I was? What was so pressing that I had to divert my time and attention from whomever I was with to check in with my piece of technology? SERIOUSLY?!?!? Turn it off, Leave it behind – actually throw it in the ocean or something!!
The past 7 months I’ve been working on this and I feel that I’ve made GREAT improvements. I have set boundaries now with my BFF and it feels good, although sometimes I break ‘em, UGH! I’m sad that I’ve sent the message to others through this senseless behavior that they are not important and I’m striving to repair that with my actions.
I am truly grateful for those who have been honest with me to point this out. It’s a catch 22 however. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you on one hand THEN I’m sorry, sorry, sorry on the other for hurting your feelings.
What prompted me to write this today is this morning I was having coffee with a dear friend of mine and we were talking about how computers, cell phones, texting, iphones – and any other device you want to name – were stealing precious time from those that we love. For me, its been my Blackberry. And after our talk this morning I got to thinking about some other things that are creeping into my world……….what is it for you? What in your world “divides” your attention from the people and things that are really important?
My morning routine, when it’s my turn to take the boys to school, is to go through the drive-thru at Starbucks and grab a coffee before I “hit the highway”. So, last Thursday I did just that. Placed my order, pulled up to the window looked in my wallet – had absolutely NO cash, thanks to the boys who tap me out continuously at the hockey rink getting snacks at the concession stand, UGH! Anyway, so I decided to grab my credit card. Thinking to me, this is embarrassing that I’m going to charge a $2.00 coffee, I decided to purchase a gift certificate for $20.00. Yeah, that’s perfect; I can use that gift card later – tomorrow! So, I gave the card to my friendly Starbucks barista and the card was DECLINED!I HAVE to tell you how the story ended with the card that morning. I went back to Starbucks sat in a comfy oversized chair with my laptop to view my account online. My balance was OVER the $900.00 limit, approximately $1,400.00 because of some preauthorization’s for hotel charges and airfare for my husband’s business trip. To my surprise the reward points that had accumulated over the years were 220,000 – I had never really looked at them before OR what I could do with them. I took the time to figure it out and I was able to convert them into cash and electronically have a deposit into our checking account. So today, I checked our account and the money was there……just over $2,000.00 can you believe it?? I used that money to pay off the new balance on the card AND had a little left over. We haven’t needed the card so now were going to cancel it. I LOVE how God works!! He’s soooooooo cool!
I started this blog on Tuesday evening, three days ago when I was sitting on an airplane flying home from Scottsdale, AZ. For some reason I had to “pack it up” and put it away, I just couldn’t focus. Here’s what I wrote on the airplane:So, 3 days later as I’m wrapping up this lingering “topic” When we don’t have any answers……I am NOT angry, instead, I am challenged to be consistent. I have no clue where reading to my brother will go. But today I will start. I pray that I will be consistent and not quit even if I don’t see the results right away that I so desire for my brother. I’m a little nervous, I have to admit, but I feel that this is the answer to one of my questions and I’m going with it.
I grew up in a rural farming town of about 1200 in central MN. Life was simple then. People took the time to stop each other on the street and visit. Have coffee. Make cookies. Life wasn’t as rushed as it is now. In my opinion, there was a lot more focus on relationship. Relationships with children, spouses, friends, neighbors, teachers, pastors, bankers… Kids weren’t running from this activity to that sporting event- or at least not as often as they are now. Families sat down and had dinner together at night. I suppose because the work day predictably ended at 5pm (at least it did in my parent’s home). There weren’t fast food restaurants to run to, or pizza delivery options to choose from.
I remember my mom getting together on a regular basis with other women and their children for ‘coffee’. This ‘coffee’ group I suspect, was really a group of amazing women getting together to talk about parenting, marriage, life experiences both good and bad. They shared each others joys and sorrows. They were a built in support group for each other and never hesitated to pray for one another. If my memory serves me correct, these were all stay at home moms, who in order to stay connected with each other, made an effort to get together in each other’s living rooms and talk. Even if it was about a new recipe they found, or a new quilting pattern they were going to try. In fact, this ‘coffee’ group continues to this day, in a more limited fashion. They are still getting together throwing bridal showers, baby showers and attending weddings for the children who were carted along to these coffee groups. (We enjoyed it by the way!)
For me, Keeping It Personal is about bringing to my life a deliberate effort to do just that. Keep it Personal. I don’t expect it to mirror my description above, as life is different now. In fact, I am sure it wasn’t as ‘simple’ as my memory would have me believe. But there are changes I can make, which I think will ultimately impact my children, my marriage, my relationship with God, and others. I was talking to Teri earlier tonight, and told her this. I have no real idea what this blog is going to turn into. Seriously, I don’t think I even knew what a blog was a year ago! I feel like we have a blank canvas in front of us. We have given much thought and prayer into KIP, and don’t feel like either of us has a clear picture of what this final work of art will look like. We want to take this opportunity to be real, to share from our own experiences, to learn from others’ experiences, and to inspire people to take it back a notch. Occasionally step out of the high tech, fast paced world we live in, and into the ‘living rooms’ of our friends both old and new…. and keep it personal. Kind of ironic that we chose a blog to carry out that message, right?
There is a bit of anxiety on my part about putting this blog out there for everyone to see. A vulnerability. I just pray that God-willing, we will encourage each other, and those who choose to follow us to keep it real, by keeping it personal.
