Trying to Find Your Identity Outside Your Home

I’ve been so thankful to write. It has given me an outlet outside of being a mom and wife. Not that being a mom and wife aren’t a priority to me. But it has made me feel like I have something to give society.

I see a lot of moms seem to have that feeling.  Whether it’s creating an Etsy store to sell homemade projects, having a part time job, or volunteering – moms have this innate need…

…to feel valued.

The thing is – it seems that we look outside of our four walls at home to find that value.

I get it. I see how the world boosts my spirits. When I actually get paid for something I write – it makes me stand a little taller, smile a little wider. Maybe even adds a little swagger in my walk.

But I was recently watching what I call a “Prairie” movie and something just became so apparent to me. Nothing mattered more than family. Nothing. Sure, people had their interests. Some of the women even expanded their gifts and talents into businesses outside of the home. But when it came down to it, family was first…


Their identity was shaped and grew because of their family unit. They thrived from the love shared, they invested everything into one another, and they dropped everything else to be there when the other truly needed it.

There was a sense of community among one another and if someone’s barn burned down, someone was ill, or any other need came up – friends actually sacrificed to help out each other.

And it just occurs to me that that’s how God created it to be.

We were created to live in community. We were created to come alongside each other and to help shape, form, and grow each other’s identities. We are missing that in today’s society…

…we are missing the mark.

It’s okay for me to want to use the gifts God gave me – but they shouldn’t shape who I am as a person. They shouldn’t become more important than the treasured people who live in my home. And I shouldn’t become so busy that I can’t run a meal to someone or sacrifice to help out a friend.

The thing is – most of us are so self-involved that we don’t even really know when someone has a true need. We’ve lost our “community” and we’ve lost our “identity.”

Love starts in the home. Love grows IN the home. And identity starts in the home and is grown in the home.

Our relationships are everything.

Question:  Where are you looking to find your identity?  What makes you feel valuable?  Share your comment by clicking here.


Today’s Post is shared by: Dionna Sanchez.  She is a freelance writer and blogger. You can stop by her blog at


  1. Linda says

    My identity comes from being a child of God, and a woman; then follows my family.
    Nothing else compares, even if it builds me up. These things rule my destiny, my passions, my dreams, my life!!!!!!!!!!!
    Everything else comes after these.

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